baby girl



baby girl,

what can I tell you

of a world

I’ll want to protect you


Your baby giggles warm my heart

and I wish they’d never stop

but I know truths lie ahead

slowly revealed

realities can’t be concealed


Progress happens slowly,

we’ve moved on,

but I need you to be strong

to know your worth

when you become

a woman,

in a world not always kind

to everyone,

not open or diverse,

small victories intersperse

with entrenched norms.

Never lose your carefree smile,

though it may wax and wane,

don’t ever let it fade,

always remember how much

you are loved.




I’m a keeper of secrets,

they eat me inside,

truths untold,

Not a real lie just a

blatant omission

a brick wall trying to keep out

the conflicts boiling within you,

unknowingly between you,

unseen, by your eyes,

unheard in your mind

but screaming in mine

to be silenced, for your sake

for a false peace

that families

foster and flourish

to calm waves,

a still lake so benign

nothing shows beneath

reflections on water.


Tell me



I need to read more
I need a book to tell
me, explain to me
Who I am,
How do I feel and why.

Always at a loss, an
Immigrant a difficult
Childhood the things
We don’t talk about–
Our lives, just disappear,
Blend in, into the background
Don’t stand out,
You’re weird, different and strange,
You’re poor,
You’ll say the wrong things,
Expose yourself just hide
And now I need a book to
tell me, who am I
and why.




If I could utter words
I’d scream from my core
I’d cry until I gasped–
I’d explain
Or try to articulate
the pain.

But it’s useless now I
Can’t translate a decade
of loss into words,
Can’t find a way back
from an unknown place,
Just loss and the
sea I find myself in,
Inevitably, inescapably,

Distant memories


Family, a loaded gun
I nuzzle up to.
Desperation makes me weak,
But mostly I keep up my

We dissolved into duties and
Obligations, shadows of love
Or care or genuine relations.

I see myself, an anchor, a
Noose, a chain dragging
You down, putting you out.

I hate myself too much
to see any other way,
to think you care
for me and for real
not out of distant




I picture you all judging me,
I’m so entangled, mired in
My own thoughts I question
What I see but know no truth.

I know you care but in my
mind you judge me,
Think ill of me,
Question my decisions,
Who I am.

I can’t see you anymore,
Not as yourselves, just
the voices in my mind
that chastise me,

Just the voices in my mind

that criticize.