Source: revolutionary-technologies.com
I mentioned in a previous post that I would be venturing back into the world of online dating. Well, here it is, I’ve taken the plunge and already learned a few lessons.
First, the importance of your profile. It’s a really good idea to have someone close to you look over your profile. I had my best friend look at it last time. She looked through my pictures and said “why would you do this?”. Apparently, unbeknownst to me, I looked clinically depressed in all my pictures. I was smiling, but they were fake smiles, thinly veiled and barely concealing the true emotion underneath. So, following her advice I chose some other photos where I was genuinely happy, and it showed.
Secondly, is the content and how you describe yourself and your interests. I love to read and write and this is a big part of who I am–however, someone who seemingly spends all her time reading is not exactly an ideal match. I somehow painted a picture of myself as a recluse who stayed home and read every night and cuddled my animals. That would be fine if it were true, but it’s not. I love my friends and spending time with them, and there are far more facets to my life and my personality than I portrayed. I don’t like tooting my own horn, but my brother and sister-in-law helped me realize that I was really selling myself short. I included more about my hobbies, various interests, career, etc. that painted a better and fuller picture of who I am.
Honestly, it’s a world of difference from what my profile was to what it is now. It reflects who I am far better than it did before, and I feel better about myself reading it. So, lesson learned: it’s good to have a close friend/family member offer their thoughts on how you’re presenting yourself!
Next comes the selection process. I tend to respond if I’m interested and that’s it. My brother and sister-in-law helped me to screen people out and to de-clutter my site. They suggested closing any matches I’m not interested in, and that has been pretty helpful.
It’s a slow and steady process but I feel better. Not sure why, but sometimes you need others to remind you of the positive attributes you possess, and what you would bring to a relationship.
So, for a rainy Monday, it’s shaping up to be a pretty good day so far.
Unlearning the Fear 